James Hock - MRH Faculty
Dyeing for a Change
By Lanessa M.
Did you dye your hair to look good for him? Is he going to want you with that hair? Did you dye it because he hurt you? These are just some of the questions that our peers viscously ask us just to get a rise, assuming we want to look good for some boy. Being in high school, almost everyone seems to think you present yourself a certain way for a certain someone. Half of the time it is true, looking good just so your crush would notice you, it’s normalized. I think looking pretty for ourselves is way better than looking good for someone who won’t even notice you. Dyeing your hair doesn’t have to be that complicated, right? We have reasons to dye our hair, whether it’s a good or bad reason. But does it really make us feel better when we change ourselves after a break-up?
It seems crazy to want to change your look just because someone hurt you, right? Wrong. Looking at yourself after a bad breakup can terrorize you, all you can think to yourself is, “why did I let myself go just for this person?” Changing your hair makes you want to look in that mirror and move forward, you don’t look like the person that they hurt anymore, that is a feeling we all mourn for. In the article “This is Why People Change Their Hair After a Break-Up” by Sophie Hines states “Dr Hole describes this as “a reflection of a desire to break with the past'. So if the 'old you' had long, blonde hair, you might feel like switching to an auburn bob will help you embrace your new life” which proves we need to feel like a new person in order to move forward from the past. I mean, no one wants to get broken up with and look the same.
If I have a new look every week, will I feel better about myself? Those questions are what make us a person. We want to either please someone else or ourselves. But is it really going to make everything better? In the article “This Is Why You Can’t Stop Dying Your Hair” by Lindsey Metrus, Vivian Diller, PhD, says, “I don’t think coloring hair can become an actual addiction unless it occurs with someone who has body dysmorphia, a serious mental illness defined by being unable to stop trying to change a flaw in one’s appearance. But, a constant need to change hair color can be associated with self-esteem issues. Using hair color to enhance one’s looks to improve self-esteem may provide temporary satisfaction, but the constant use of hair dye for that purpose will likely have the opposite impact.” We think changing ourselves constantly is going to be good for us, but eventually we lose our connection to ourselves. Change is good, once in a while. Continuing the change will make us slowly not recognize ourselves. But in the end, the real question you should probably ask yourself is, did I do it for me?